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An Open Letter to My Best Friend - Dont get swallowed by...THE BLOG!
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An Open Letter to My Best Friend

Please stop fucking up your relationships. Please. If not for yourself, then please do it for me. For you see Stephen you are a lucky guy in that 2 years you have been with 2 very cool girls. I really liked Johanna.

And I like Renee even more. I like her as a person and as a friend. I enjoy hanging out with her. This past summer I even wanted her to come with us to Bonnaroo. The fact that I would even consider being in a car with someone for 12 hours let alone preferred it to the option of her not going says a lot. That is why I do not like it when you fuck up your relationships. You get these awesome girls to fall for you, and then you fuck it up. Stop buying BMWs and crashing them into trees! And on the other end of the spectrum, Alicia, the one piece of shit clunker you ever encountered, is the one you held on to the tightest. Thank goodness that is in the past.

And the whole point it to never crash the BMW. Sure you may think that if you crash it, you can fix it. But once you crash it, its never the same again. It may feel like it rides the same, but the engine's been fixed and a lot of work was put in to make like before, but it never actually is like it was before.

Or how about this: How about if you crash this BMW, you never mention the new Mercedes you get 4 months later. Cuz If you crash this BMW, you're prolly gonna crash the Mercedes, and then you'll crash the Lexus and all the cars after that. And then we'll be in our 30s and everyone will be driving Camrys, Accords, and (UGH) Caravans and I'll still be hitchhiking. But you'll be leasing an Audi. But all that can be avoided, just, Dont crash the BMW.
2 comments or Leave a comment
From: thegodofwar Date: September 30th, 2004 09:38 am (UTC) (Link)
I hope he doesn't suffer from that "blind to really obvious symbolism" disease.
dnalloh From: dnalloh Date: September 30th, 2004 07:22 pm (UTC) (Link)
oh fifi, you make my days. and the fact that i followed that, and the fact that you called a certain oboist a clunker, well, that just made my today.
2 comments or Leave a comment